Humorist Dave Barry supplies the answer:
On Thanksgiving, be grateful - and very, very afraidIt's no wonder we've become a nation of neurotics.
Thanksgiving is a time of traditions, and there is no tradition more meaningful than the annual U.S. Department of Agriculture warning about fatal food-dwelling bacteria.
Recently, I'm pleased to report, the department has outdone itself: it has officially advised Americans not to stuff their turkeys. Alert readers sent in an Associated Press item in which the manager of the U.S. Department of Agriculture's Meat and Poultry Hot Line is quoted as saying: "Improperly cooked stuffing can cause serious illness or even death."
But the looming specter of a painful death should in no way dampen the festivity of your Thanksgiving dinner. Just make sure the food is prepared in accordance with federal guidelines ... (link)
"My daughter just sneezed. Aaaaagggghhhh!!!!"